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First of all, you can “meet” lots of people without leaving the house—although presumably you’ll eventually want to gussy up and meet some of them face-to-face.You have a degree of control over interactions; email is an opportunity to dip a toe into a new connection without being trapped with a blowhard at Starbucks.Every word counts, so you want to make sure every sentence and story is memorable. Besides, you’ll have plenty of time to share more on your actual date and during the phone calls or emails before the date.4) Double-check that your profile will be appealing to the opposite sex and test it out—conduct your very own focus group!The days of looking down on online dating as a last resort for losers are past us.Online dating is an established fact of modern life, with sites from Tinder to Christian Mingle offering options for all kinds of daters.Be strategic about picking a username: In this situation, sex doesn’t sell. Hoehn suggests puns and clever wordplay (Last Man Camping for an outdoorsman, for example); pop culture references (Not Bradley Cooper or No Sleep Since Brooklyn); or just something silly and absurd (Birds With Shoes). As comfortable in old jeans as you are in heels and a dress? Do you like cuddling by a crackling fire and long walks on the beach? Focus on you: Everything you say in your profile should be about you. Tell the world why rather than explaining what Buddhism is about. How are your conservative values reflected in the way you live? You want it to sound like you’re chatting over coffee, not presenting your resume. People probably won’t read a long profile, and you’ll come across as self-absorbed and like you might be the dreaded first-date blowhard.

Sell yourself, but softly; use humor and gentle self-deprecation.

Make sure all your photos aren’t catching you in the same pose with the same “having my photo taken” smile.

Change up your outfits (she particularly warns men of this); mix up the activities you show yourself doing, so it doesn’t look like you have limited interests; make eye contact with the viewer in at least a couple of photos (and sunglasses in only one photo, if any); smile; use your pets if you have ‘em.

If you’re really stuck, you can always ask friends to remind you.

Then, have a few trusted opposite-sex friends read your finished product and get their feedback.

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